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newlifeinstpaul ([personal profile] newlifeinstpaul) wrote2016-03-14 03:29 pm
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Horrible Thoughts


Inconceivable!







Click below and I'll reveal all sorts of Unspeakable Secrets about my wife.





She does not enjoy pie. Nor does she care for Oreo cookies.

I've long warned her that there's trick questions regarding pie and Oreos in the US Citizenship exam. They'll present multiple choice questions 'bout your favorite flavo(u)r, while including a final choice 'None at all--I don't like them.' Should an examinee deny a love of either dessert? Testing personnel are instructed to drop their questions on the floor, summon ICE and deport them IMMEDIATELY.

Me: Weeks will pass! They'll keep me spinning in administrative circles!
B: *eye roll*
Me: And finally they'll take me in a dark room, shine a light in my face and say, "You KNEW, didn't you?"
B: Yeah-right.
Me: So what I'm tryin' to say is, How 'bout Birthday Cake Oreos? They got those Stupid Sprinklies you like!
B: Nope.
Me: Dammit!






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[identity profile] cherrytattoo77.livejournal.com 2016-03-15 06:45 pm (UTC)(link)
I only like fried pies. Well, and chocolate pie... and peanut butter pie. And s'mores pie.

[identity profile] newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com 2016-03-17 02:15 am (UTC)(link)
And here I was, wondering Gee, wonder if she's gonna say anything really Southern and BAM you knocked that gustatory softball straight thru Earth's atmosphere....
Edited 2016-03-17 02:15 (UTC)

[identity profile] cherrytattoo77.livejournal.com 2016-03-17 04:20 am (UTC)(link)
... and buttermilk pie, and custard pie, and chess pie, and peach pie, and pecan pie, oh and moonpies of course. Guess I lied, I love pie. Southern? Pie is American!

[identity profile] newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com 2016-03-17 11:10 am (UTC)(link)
'MEERKIN!
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