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From the desk of Cedar POINT and 'Dem Entertainment company:
SANDUSKY, OHIO, March 9, 2009 -- Cedar Fair Entertainment Company (NYSE: FUN), a leader in regional amusement resorts, water parks and active entertainment, today announced it will decrease its annual distribution rate to $1.00 per limited partner unit. On a quarterly basis, the Company’s distribution rate will be $0.25 per unit and will begin with the distribution that is expected to be declared in the second quarter of 2009.
This will ensure that this deep-in-hock amusement company--which by the way, was doing just fine 'till they spent a billion plus buying a chain of parks as big as they already were--will continue to plunge on NYSE from 20-buck-plus a few months back to 6 bucks at the moment to oh, let's say 2 or 3.
I guess THIS might be one of the reasons their CEO chucked 13% of his own personally-controlled partnership units before this announcement. Ya think? Yeah, cuz he'd make a mint selling those (bleep)ers this week!
And while they continue to build 20 million dollar monster coasters for their 'new' parks--you know, the ones that were already drawing 2 million visitors a year or better without the 20 million dollar coasters? Gee, how does THAT happen?--they've also decided to lift a leg on their parks in smaller markets. You know, the ones that still turn a profit and got them their reputation to begin with.
It has also completed a strategic review of its assets and has decided to explore the potential sale of Worlds of Fun, in Kansas City, Missouri and Valleyfair, in Shakopee, Minnesota. The Company said it would be premature to speculate on either the price or timing of any potential transaction.
Well SCREW YOU TOO ya buncha (bleep bleepity bleep bleep bleeeep)ing (BLEEPS).
I honestly hope they sell. Truly, deeply, fully. Almost literally itch with the hope that they do. Ya know why?
First of all, Cedar Point and 'Dem, LLC has already poisoned the water hole as far as VF and WoF are concerned. They've already shown their hand. They've already declared them the red-headed stepchildren in a new blended family. So we already know they're getting the butt end of any cap investment dollars, profitable or not. It's like 'separating' from your spouse and living in the basement. It doesn't work. It's WEIRD.
Second, whoever buys the parks--if there's anyone out there who will or even CAN?--is probably not going to pull it off via highly leveraged buyout. I have the funny feeling that's just not gonna fly these days.
Third, maybe just maybe a new owner would quit with CPandD's micro-managing, over-reaching, fingers-in-every-last-thing-you-try-to-do style of operation and do what works best for the park and the park alone. The property has land they've never built on and potential they've never tapped. Not that it should be tapped right here, right now. Oh no. Nooooo no no no. But with a little time, you never know.
And finally? Speaking of coasters and rides and attractions? There's all kinds of good mid-market priced coasters and things with actual...wait, what are those things called? INVERSIONS? that could possibly show up at the park now. You know, the product of Kinzel's-not-telling-them-what-to-do-every-twelve-to-fifteen-seconds-and-don't-buy-those-loopy-coasters-cuz-the-families-don't-like-'em-cuz-those-over-the-shoulder-harnesses-are-uncomfortable-on-my-grey-haired-thick-headed-don't-wanna-pay-my-employees-minimum-wage-in-Ohio-senior-citizen-moobs.
Could be the best thing that ever happened.
You never know.
SANDUSKY, OHIO, March 9, 2009 -- Cedar Fair Entertainment Company (NYSE: FUN), a leader in regional amusement resorts, water parks and active entertainment, today announced it will decrease its annual distribution rate to $1.00 per limited partner unit. On a quarterly basis, the Company’s distribution rate will be $0.25 per unit and will begin with the distribution that is expected to be declared in the second quarter of 2009.
This will ensure that this deep-in-hock amusement company--which by the way, was doing just fine 'till they spent a billion plus buying a chain of parks as big as they already were--will continue to plunge on NYSE from 20-buck-plus a few months back to 6 bucks at the moment to oh, let's say 2 or 3.
I guess THIS might be one of the reasons their CEO chucked 13% of his own personally-controlled partnership units before this announcement. Ya think? Yeah, cuz he'd make a mint selling those (bleep)ers this week!
And while they continue to build 20 million dollar monster coasters for their 'new' parks--you know, the ones that were already drawing 2 million visitors a year or better without the 20 million dollar coasters? Gee, how does THAT happen?--they've also decided to lift a leg on their parks in smaller markets. You know, the ones that still turn a profit and got them their reputation to begin with.
It has also completed a strategic review of its assets and has decided to explore the potential sale of Worlds of Fun, in Kansas City, Missouri and Valleyfair, in Shakopee, Minnesota. The Company said it would be premature to speculate on either the price or timing of any potential transaction.
Well SCREW YOU TOO ya buncha (bleep bleepity bleep bleep bleeeep)ing (BLEEPS).
I honestly hope they sell. Truly, deeply, fully. Almost literally itch with the hope that they do. Ya know why?
First of all, Cedar Point and 'Dem, LLC has already poisoned the water hole as far as VF and WoF are concerned. They've already shown their hand. They've already declared them the red-headed stepchildren in a new blended family. So we already know they're getting the butt end of any cap investment dollars, profitable or not. It's like 'separating' from your spouse and living in the basement. It doesn't work. It's WEIRD.
Second, whoever buys the parks--if there's anyone out there who will or even CAN?--is probably not going to pull it off via highly leveraged buyout. I have the funny feeling that's just not gonna fly these days.
Third, maybe just maybe a new owner would quit with CPandD's micro-managing, over-reaching, fingers-in-every-last-thing-you-try-to-do style of operation and do what works best for the park and the park alone. The property has land they've never built on and potential they've never tapped. Not that it should be tapped right here, right now. Oh no. Nooooo no no no. But with a little time, you never know.
And finally? Speaking of coasters and rides and attractions? There's all kinds of good mid-market priced coasters and things with actual...wait, what are those things called? INVERSIONS? that could possibly show up at the park now. You know, the product of Kinzel's-not-telling-them-what-to-do-every-twelve-to-fifteen-seconds-and-don't-buy-those-loopy-coasters-cuz-the-families-don't-like-'em-cuz-those-over-the-shoulder-harnesses-are-uncomfortable-on-my-grey-haired-thick-headed-don't-wanna-pay-my-employees-minimum-wage-in-Ohio-senior-citizen-moobs.
Could be the best thing that ever happened.
You never know.
