Last Chance...

...to not fuck it up.

Brenda's last chemo was today. She was (has been) super boo-hooey about it. "What would I ever do WITHOUT you?" she keeps sobbing while hucking another nose fulla snot. You'd be absolutely FINE cuz that's who you are, you're made of Very Strong Stuff is not what comes out of my mouth. Keep thinking it. Wanna say it. But I don't. Too busy thinking of Stupid Shit to Say to distract her into laughter instead.

The Not Fucking Up has to do with my handling of the week. Shoving myself out of bed early enough to run before infusion, not after. Having everything on cue for her and me, too. Trying my damndest to avoid that Thursday feeling of 'How'd you manage to piss away yet another week...and precisely what around you have you accomplished in this time?'

We'll see how we do. Ask me again on Thursday if on second thought? Please don't.