Those Precious Moments of Slumber

This really isn't why I keep a laptop on the lowest level of my nightstand...? But it should be. Had to record this somewhere before I forgot it. Actually, B's sensitive to light sooOOooo I'm typing on the floor in Two. Which doesn't make much sense either BUT walking into Bathroom One or Two with a laptop might be harder to explain. Oh c'mon honey! I didn't need to rub one out while watching porn at 6 in the morning! I've still got an imagination you know. Besides it's my day off; if that's what I wanted to do--which I don't? I could simply wait till you leave for work oh shit DID THAT SLIP!?!?!? Awkward. None of which had anything to do with my original thought. Just riffing long enough to forget it. Where was I? Oh yes.

Had a dream; just awoke from it. I was rich. Stupidly rich. Incredibly. Clap-your-hand-to-your-mouth-how-the-(bleep)-did-THAT-happen rich. Put it this way:

So rich that Kevin Garnett (Do you know him? NBA player? First contract worth $126 millionish?) rode me around on his back. Nay, his shoulders actually. And not just for fun. He was my butler-slash-confidante-slash-HORSE. As in walking-thru-a-mall whoa Kevin, back up I couldn't read that banner there. Tip me to the left a bit? Nah, not a good sale! Keep going down the stairs... And that was simply The Way It Was.

Oh, and I'd just lost some endorsement deal with some other retailer (in the mall I was 'riding' him thru) and was rich-person 'Don't need the money, y'all ain't shit anyhow' miffed about it. Kev and I were sniping about it to each other and laughing. Wait, wait. THIS is how rich I was tho. I was a lil' full of spicy food and a bit lactose intolerant and well you know...resultantly chatty from the back end? Dude wouldn't say ONE WORD. And I was whoever-crawled-up-your-ass-to-die-musta-rolled-in-a-huge-pot-of-curry rank. Even I was embarrassed, thinking holy (bleep) he's gotta feel warm breeze on his neck, much less the smell so I had him set me down for a bit to pretend to need something close to the ground and then I awoke and my Personal Horsey was gone. Or back to earning $8 million of his own a year.

Least the room still smelled funny.