No, Sir. Didn't Like It!

This movie can lick my unwashed, post-half-marathon taint.

I like Leo. Love Iñárritu--for fuck's sake, you should have heard me carry on about Birdman. The cinematography was great. I cared about Leo's character and his welfare BUT I disconnected less than five minutes into the film. If you've already seen it, you can probably guess why.

Yippee yay rah Blue-Eyed Justice. And perhaps a twitch of incidental, accidental side 'justice' for anyone who isn't. A film about retribution my month-old unwashed jock strap.

They really had to call them Tree 'People', huh?

If B wants to watch it again, she can. It will be without me. If she wants to buy a copy, that's on her. Sure as hell won't be my gift.

To be perfectly honest, I'm more upset with the Academy than anyone involved with this movie.

This is neither the first nor last 'award quality' movie (per the Bloated, Saggy-balled, out-of-touch Academy members) I'd borrow a Saint Bernard for it to shit on. Which doesn't simply include the usual Twelve-Years-an-Amistad-Help-Butler-Step-N-Fetchit-Driving-Ms-Act-Like-You-Want-Some-Dick-From-Billy-Bob-Thornton bullshit. You think the depiction of the Hmong in Gran Torino didn't piss me off? 'Livid' doesn't begin to cover it. And please don't think that's simply because more Hmong live here than anywhere else in America and half of the local Hmong I've had the privilege of knowing wanted to marry me into their distant family in my single days. Whole groups of people classified as less-than-equal don't sit well with me. Never will. Don't like it? Tough Shit.

To slather this film with nominations and barely touch the actors of The Hateful Eight (save for Jennifer Jason Leigh, who wasn't the SECOND-best actor, not even close) speaks volumes about the Academy. None of it good.