BEST TRAVEL NEWS ITEMS THIS MONTH!!

[newlifeinstpaul]

Runner-up: The TSA will let me carry this on a flight! Wheeeeeeeee!!!!



I'm sure everyone standing downwind from me after my flight next month will be breathing a sigh of relief. OH WAIT. My gel insoles and deodorant are still banned?!!?!?

Fine. I'll still reek of foot and ass, but it will be properly moisturized foot and ass.
Plus my breath won't stink.

But that still comes in second to my favorite:

TSA Booty Up for Grabs on eBay

Are they suggesting it's a good time to be single after all?
FOURTH GRADE FOR LIFE YO. WHA WHA?!?!

Comments

[sierra.livejournal.com]

I thought you could take deoderant on flights?

Well, if you are limited to one quart size bag per traveler, James and I will share shampoo and conditioner and toothpaste to save some room, so we can each take deoderant and hair gel. *grins* Hmm... His mom said he'll probably check a bag and that I should too (still, I'm packing deoderant and a change of clothes as I DON"T trust airlines, even if I'm on a direct flight!) so I don't have to worry about that.

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

Not deodorant or insoles made of gel, tho.
Stop thinking about my humor and just laugh dammit! XD

[vikarious.livejournal.com]

At hockey season, they will be assembling a "hockey kit" for sale on the web. Other items include furry handcuffs, a sausage grinder and a six-foot electric palm tree.


Ha!
at first I read that the hockey kit included furry handcuffs, a sausage grinder and a 6-foot palm tree and couldn't figure out HOW in the world those things went with Hockey.

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

You read the ARTICLE?

[vikarious.livejournal.com]

Well, I've been looking for a new swiss army knife and set of fuzzy handcuffs...

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

Pfffffffffft I could loan you mine XD XD XD XD XD

[notashamed.livejournal.com]

*runs away from the man in the feather hat*

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

Hark hark, fair maiden!
*or something medieval like that*

Behold thine retreating BahDonkaDonk!

[notashamed.livejournal.com]

*blank stare*

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

_{never mind.}

[notashamed.livejournal.com]

are you the same person you used to be? you give up so quickly.

and for no good reason

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

Whatever doest thou mean?

I've just harkened back from many a valiant search on E-Bay.
It would seem there are no Minnesota backsides up for grabs.

*pouts*

[notashamed.livejournal.com]

wow, selling ass on Ebay. That's.... new.

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

Hay-Zeus marimba, fellowmen!
Catchest thou the bolded large headline at ALL?

Or didst thine simply wish to pretend you hadn't?

[notashamed.livejournal.com]

I saw it and then i ignored it.
and then i started talking about your hat
and you brought it back to booty.
and i stared blankly at you b/c said comments warrant no response.
and then my brain exploded.

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

Expected thou something highbrow instead?

_{Oh look. I've become medieval YODA}

[notashamed.livejournal.com]

highbrow? from you?
not so much.

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

Then let it be declared that from this day forward, the word 'Booty' in my blog is limited to That Other Thing Besides Loot.

Typical bodily function joke coming in 3...2...

[princess-design.livejournal.com]

Well, I think you will look uber-sexay on a plane with bonne belle lip gloss.

[princess-design.livejournal.com]

True Dat!

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

But Gurl? That foundation is NOT gonna work with my summer tan.
MmmmmmHMMMM.

*neck motion*

[lilrongal.livejournal.com]

But... why would your armpits smell like ass?

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

Cuz 'foot and pits' doesn't have the same ring to it?

Oh come on Mizz Editor Lady. Back away from the oily bolts and gears of the merely factual and see the beauty and flow of the language!


Snorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt OKAY I give up.
_{I can't believe I defended that one!}

[lilrongal.livejournal.com]

LMAO!!!!!

*wipes tears from eyes*

[newlifeinstpaul.livejournal.com]

Did the links on my previous post about the Renaissance Fair work for you?
You have catching up to do. From the Toothless Midget days, at that!